“When I’m making $250k in my coaching business, I’ll finally be enough and successful!”
For a while, $250k became my benchmark—close to what I made as an engineering manager.
I set this goal to prove to myself (and others) that I can make good money doing what I LOVE.
After all, if I can do it, others can too, right?
At the first glance, there is nothing wrong with that.
“Proving myself” has always been my winning formula:
- It motivates me to work harder.
- It pushes me to show up bolder.
- It leads me to say yes and try new things—just to prove I can.
- It helps me connect with others who feel the same drive.
And yes, it definitely feels good when I feel I’ve “proven myself.”
But here’s the catch: that sense of value and success only sticks around as long as I keep proving myself.
- If someone sees my value, I feel good.
- If I reach a goal, I’m enough.
- If my revenue hits a certain number, I’m successful.
It’s like I’m only worthy if I’m actively proving myself. And each new goal means I have to start all over again.
Sure, reaching milestones feels amazing.
But, it’s also exhausting.
How many times do we have to prove ourselves before we feel whole?
The truth is, this foundation isn’t solid.
When my self-worth depends on external benchmarks, my confidence and joy fluctuate with every change outside of me.
It’s like chasing a moving target, and it’s robbing me of enjoying the journey to my goals.
Last weekend, I experienced a radical shift by asking myself one question:
“What if—just what if—I’ve got nothing to prove?”
Sitting with that thought lifted a huge weight off my shoulders.
With that space opened up, I asked myself, “If I don’t need to prove anything, why am I doing this?”
And my heart answered, “To have FUN!”
So naturally, I went even further:
“What if… I’m not just aiming for $250k, but instead, I’m meant to create a 7-digit business?”
Wow. Scary? Yes. Fun? Absolutely. And…why not?
For the first time, I’m able to laugh at my revenue goal instead of feeling weighed down by self-doubt.
When I don’t have to prove anything, I feel free to dream even bigger because it doesn’t discount who I am right now.
When I anchor myself in having fun, the journey becomes an adventure I can actually enjoy.
How about you?
What would you do if you had nothing to prove?
Loving you,
Wen
P.S. Are you tired of constantly proving yourself? Ready to add more joy to the journey toward your goals? Let’s Talk!